Boriqua!

For the past couple of weeks I've noticed that Joshua's social skills have gotten a lot better. In the past he would only engage people who were completely ignoring him. If anyone spoke to him first, he would either cry or completely ignore them. Now he actually responds like a little man.

Yesterday at my dad's everyone had a blast with him. They were getting him to dance merengue and say, "Boriqua!" lol. It was quite amusing. Apparently some of it stuck.

Today we went out to buy "safer" christmas tree ornaments since my little engineer takes apart the current ones I have (down to the wires) and crushes the blown glass. On our way home, I put on some college radio station that was playing carribean music of a sort. From the back seat I hear a little voice say, "Wepa" - oh my goodness I laughed so hard. He knew from that point that he must've said something funny, so he kept saying it. No matter what kind of music I put on, he would say, "Mommy! Wepa!" lol. I have a little boriqua in my home.

**PS: For those that don't know, wepa is a like the Puerto Rican version of woohoo and boriqua is another term for Puerto Rican.

Thanksgiving

20 Things I am grateful to Yahweh for (in no particular order):

1. My health and the health of my loved ones
2. My immediate, extended and church families
3. Friends who still love me despite all my shortcomings
4. My gifts and talents
5. My home; the first house I've ever lived in that is my own
6. My marriage that has weathered storms and continues to prevail victoriously
7. The resurrection of POC
8. The fact that I can hear His voice
9. My funny, witty, kind Joshua and the baby girl due soon :)
10. Pastors Dan and Ann Stratton and their dynamic daughter, Danielle
11. Faith Exchange Fellowship - my church - with all its wonderful opportunities to grow spiritually, physically, mentally, emotionally, socially and financially
12. Living on the northeast and experiencing four distinct seasons
13. The mandate of opening a private school unlike any we've seen on the upper east coast.
14. The fact that I'm beautifully and wonderfully made
15. Pierre, the individual - he's my best friend.
16. The abundance of truth that I know, and the truth I put in practice
17. His grace!
18. Abundant life: new beginnings, ended chapters, and everything in between
19. The power of words to change any circumstance
20. My covenant with Yah and the blessing on my life that will bless others immensely

The resurrection of POC

Ever since our last meeting, I pretty much laid POC to rest. I knew that we are called to do great things together as a group of powerful women and friends, but just felt like POC itself as an entity no longer had a place in anyone's life. I was wrong...it has a place in my life.

For the past couple of weeks, Yahweh has been repeating Himself to me over and over that POC is very much alive and needs to remain that way. His exact words to me are, "You are Point of Creation." He told me that in church one Sunday. The following week I received an email from the long forgotten POC website that a "Juanita Evans" from NYC had filled out the contact form. Here is what she wrote:

"Learning about Point of Creation is such a wonderful blessing to me. This is what I have been looking for, for many years. Thank God for you!!! I would like to attend your next meeting."

At first it made me feel horrible. What meeting? What can we possible offer this person who sees us as an answer to her prayers just from our outdated website? The answer is simple, and it is what POC was designed to do from the beginning - rather, it is what I have been designed to do from the beginning...awaken the Yah-given dream in her and give her the support she needs to follow it through. Period. How did it ever become so complicated?

This week Yah awakened me at 4am simply to create this on photoshop:


Then a few days later he awakened me at the same time (3:57am, to be exact) and gave me a song that I cannot remember the tune of, but do remember the words. That simply tells me it only had a tune so that I would remember the words (since I was half asleep):

I am the Point of Creation (meaning me)
I am the Yud in Your Hand
Use me to light the fire in their souls
Use me to bring your words to their fleshly homes.

I say all this to say that I've always known my purpose and my calling - it has always been very clear until I tried to complicate it. I, Yadira Laguerre, exist to light the fire in others. I exist to bring out the purpose in Yah's children, to cause others to excel in their callings. That is what motivates me. That is what causes me to wake up in the morning with zeal in my step. My photography, my graphic design, even my singing and dancing, are all tools and not callings in and of themselves. I am Point of Creation. My pastor told me that even my very name Yadi in Hebrew means, "My Point of Creation". I am the flaming Yud in Yahweh's hand.

I don't know what the other 5 girls feel about this - but since they are the ones most likely to read this, I'll just ask...what do you feel about this? Are you a flaming Yud in Yahweh's hand, or did you join me because I lit your fire? In the next few months I will be revamping the POC website to include all sorts of interactive community aspects to better reach out to the "Juanitas" out there who are looking for someone to awaken them to their purpose. I am even going to be doing a live broadcast "television" show on UStream on a weekly basis. Do I have 5 girls with me who are on fire about lighting the fire in others? I am ready to be who Yah always intended me to be, and I am ready to start from scratch. If this calling speaks to you, contact me. Let's change lives together.

Sweet Agreement

I'm currently 33 weeks pregnant, and just a few moments ago my husband and I came to an agreement on what to name our daughter. WOOHOO! Neither one of us is promising that we're not going to change our minds from now until she arrives...but just for a moment, agreement is nice :)

I had been stuck on Juliette, and calling her that since almost the beginning, but Pierre kept saying that's not her name. I thought naturally he would just come around. Once again, however, he was right. While I was sitting in church on Sunday a name I had thrown around a bit earlier came back to me. I wrote it down and shared it with Pierre this morning. He got a sparkle in his eye and said, "that's more like it." No, it's not Joie, either.

We'll keep the name to ourselves...not sure for what reason other than Rachael did it with Scarlett and it drove me bananas! lol. Do unto others as they have done to you; isn't that how it goes? No? I'm kidding. The real reason is I'm horrible at keeping my own secrets and would like to try it out for a change. It'll be an exercise in discipline...so please don't ask! :) I just wanted to document the day we agreed on her name. Awe, in a few weeks I'll have a daughter.

Posting for the heck of it

All is well here. It's been a little while since I last wrote and I wanted to check in to say that there is peace in my home, love in my heart, joy in my spirit and a gratitude in my step. Halleluyah.

I finished a graphics design project for a client and it gave me such satisfaction. It reminded me of the pure pleasure of doing what speaks to you at your core. I have three photoshoots coming up next week that will all be very different. This is where I belong. I was recruited to an administrator position for a creative arts group on cafemom where I get to design every week. I've been doing it for about three weeks now. I get to see members from all over the world signing their posts with my creations. Bliss. Just this past Friday a logo I submitted was chosen to replace their regular logo for the day of their 2nd birthday as a site. Oh yeah, and I woke up about two weeks ago with a brand new song - it's hot.

Creation is where it's at - Yahweh had the right idea. What an awesome Father to have passed that ability on to us. Thank you, Abba.

Relief

It was a rough couple of days for me, feeling a bit like an alien in a world of rejoicing. Praise Yah, sweet relief has come. Pierre told me that Kim Clement (one of the prophets in the land who is very accurate) would be speaking live about the elections so we stayed up to watch. Apparently he has been prophesying about the elections throughout the year and revisited those prophesies in light of the outcome. Although I still stand 100% behind my voting decision, I am now at peace with the entire situation and even excited about what Yahweh is going to do in the next few years. Like I said in my aftermath post, this is just like Him.

Here is the link if you want to watch it:
http://www.christian.tv/channels/details/video/21/mediapage/6964

The aftermath

At midnight on Nov 4th, 2008, Barack Hussein Obama got elected as the 44th President of the United States of America.

I sat up watching ABC news as the polls were closing and they announced who was getting the electoral votes state by state. The entire day before the news started broadcasting, I was pacing the floor and eating left over halloween candy. I kept telling myself to trust Yahweh. The problem is that I know Him - how He likes to make the enemy appear as if he is winning right before He displays His glory in a huge victory. Knowing this didn't give me comfort. lol. I knew the likely outcome, and I didn't like it.

Sure enough around 9:30 they announced that Barack had won Ohio (a huge battleground that no republican has ever lost and still won presidency). To my own surprise, I broke down and started sobbing uncontrollably. lol I'm pregnant. At that point I knew that it was official. I stayed up to hear John McCain's concession speech, which was very honorable and dignified despite the people booing in the crowd every time he mentioned Obama's name. The popular vote turned out pretty close, so I can imagine there are many people truly upset at the turnout this morning.

Which brings me to the daily prayer call. Since I went to bed late (right around the time Obama started speaking - I still cannot sit through his speeches), I was half asleep during the prayer call this morning. I vaguely heard as person after person prayed the scriptures in victory, declaring Yah's word in faith like we should be doing at this time. Suddenly at the end of the prayer call, one woman started yelling, "Obama!" with hilarious laughter over and over again - interrupting the person that was praying. Gloria Bradford had to tell the person repeatedly to mute their call. That woke me up.

After that, a woman from Ohio(I won't mention her name) said she wanted to pray for Obama. Cool. She started out declaring that no weapon formed against him will prosper and every tongue that rises against him in judgement will be condemned. Necessary. Then she went on to say that the prophets in the land needed to repent because they were obviously wrong and had led people astray, that too many people were hiding behind the guise of christianity and that God had exposed them for what they really are by allowing Obama to be President and that she was so grateful she had eyes to see what was really happening throughout the election. WHAT?!

Look, the bottom line is that Yahweh reigns. His will would be done and His plan would be accomplished because He is Yahweh. It was still up to each and every person to choose which idiology they would align themselves with, and the choice was crystal clear. Now it is our responsibility like never before to pray. Yahweh holds the heart of the kings in His hands and He turns them whichever way He wants. This is a wake up call for America - specifically for Christians. This is not a time to sit back and rejoice, condemning the prophets in the land for trying to warn people of what was to come. This is a time to sit high on our watchtower and be vigilant. It saddens me deeply that this election has brought such a huge division in the body of Moshiac, but His plan is to awaken the sleeping lions. It's been His plan for a long time, through many events. What else has to happen for His body to wake up?

Personally, the internet and the TV are going off for a long while. Eating out and spending money entertaining myself are both taking a long break. It's time to really dive into deep waters so that I have nothing natural to stand on for miles in any direction. I felt this consecration coming for a long time, but not like this. There's no turning back. Yah's will be done. This President needs our support - not with vain cheers, but with true prayer.

Restoration Update

I've been meaning to write an update to the candid blog I wrote a month ago. In the past two days, two people have read it for the first time - and I don't believe in coincidences...so let me write the update before we have a new Presidential elect and there will be other things on my mind! :)

It's been a little over a month since I almost walked out on my marriage. In the grand scheme of things, that is not a long time. However, it feels surreal, like a nightmare from my childhood instead of a day that actually took place. All the events leading up to it even seem like scenes from a Lifetime movie. Everything is so different now.

From the very next morning when my husband and I had a heart to heart, things have never been the same. I've heard of Yahweh doing "suddenlies", but I never really experienced one so dramatic and permanently life changing. Pierre began waking up early to journal and really spend time hearing the voice of Yah in a quiet place without agenda. I can honestly say that just by doing that, his whole demeanor was altered. Our marriage is truly beautiful. We had a couple days last week where I was tempted to think nothing had changed simply because he gave me a little attitude (LOL) - but then I quickly remembered that those few uncomfortable hours of Pierre being cranky were once a "day in, day out" misery and that I needed to have grace. Lord knows I have my bad days!

We never actually got together with our pastors for counseling, but still intend to do so. We've since visited my family on Long Island who, thank goodness, are very forgiving in some ways and treated Pierre with the same love they did before. All in all, the entire experience is something that I never want to forget for the sake of helping others - but one that I'm glad I wrote about because it has quickly become so foreign.

I praise Yahweh with all my might. He is so good. I know that not all stories of abuse end like this, so I do not take His mercy and grace on our lives for granted.