Prophesy vs. Prosperity

Last night Dr. Jesse Duplantis came to teach at our church. As always, he was hilarious - but more so, his message set off sparks in me. I want to get the CD and listen to it over and over until it sinks in. My first thought after thinking that was, "Oh no...I'm off into a new subject again!!"

Here I am on this prophetic kick, practicing the voice of Yahweh and listening to prophetic teachings...and now I'm being pulled in the prosperity direction to do the same diligent study. I know what you're thinking, "It's all the Word, right? What difference does it make?" It makes a huge difference. It's like wanting to go to Law school and Med school at the same time.

You never see prophetic teachers and prosperity teachers running in the same circles. Yes, prophetic teachers speak about total life wellness and prosperity teachers speak about hearing the voice of Yah - in that sense it crosses over a bit. Yet neither one of the two really delves into the opposite subject in the sense that I am feeling pulled to do. It's a good thing I was able to resolve this seeming dichotomy in my spirit on the car drive home.

The answer is, I really do have to study both topics - as well as be a diligent student of my own pastor whose teachings are a complete course in themselves. I really do have to venture into the land of Rick Joyner, John Paul Jackson, Jim Driscoll, etc to get my prophetic training -AND- into the land of Jesse Duplantis, Kenneth Copeland, Bill Winston, Miles Monroe, etc to renew my mind for total life prosperity. I really do need to emmerse myself in the Hebrew and the apostolic, yoke destroying, burden removing messages of Pastor Dan Stratton. They are ALL essential to my life as a Christian, to live in the blessing and bring miracles to those around me. The only part of my schedule that will suffer are the many idle moments during the day where I'm tempted to do a myriad of mindless things. That's quite alright with me.

It turns out I'm not a pschytso after all...amen to that!

Look...Admit...Expect

Before I met my husband, I thought the prophetic was something that worked at YHWH's whim. I believed that YHWH could give me a word of knowledge for someone whenever He felt like it and it was then my decision as to whether or not I would deliver that word to the person (depending on if I believed I was hearing from YHWH...usually I didn't believe it). Upon meeting Pierre, who had been studying the prophetic for years and praying for a prophetic wife, I learned that it is a gift just like any other which can be improved by study and practice. Whoa.

That was 4 years ago. I've since let that knowledge slip, but am ready to take the bull by the horns. I downloaded a bunch of free podcasts from www.stirthewater.com with Jim Driscoll, as well as their linked sites. I've listened to one of them (Growing Your Faith to See, Part 1). This is what I learned:

The first step is to ask YHWH a question and then LOOK to see what He is showing you. Don't have predisposed expectations of what you're supposed to see, just look objectively at whatever He is showing you - even if it doesn't seem to answer your question.

The next step is to ADMIT what you're seeing. Do not dismiss it. Admitting what you see is in itself an act of faith. If you don't act in faith, you lose faith. Do not allow fear or trepidation to come in at this point; just write down what you are seeing/feeling/hearing without making any judgement on it.

The third step is to EXPECT understanding. When you get a revelation that you can't make heads or tails of, go back to YHWH with it. Believe by faith that what you have heard is correct, and expect the interpretation. YHWH wants to train you in hearing Him more clearly, but He can't do it if you are constantly questioning whether or not what you hear/see is valid. It is valid - now get the understanding.

Jim Driscoll gave a personal example of a time when for 21 days he went to YHWH every morning and asked Him what was going to happen that day. One day YHWH told him there was going to be a lot of change. Jim looked over his journal at the end of the day and realized nothing much had changed. He didn't say, "Oh well, I guess I missed it," (which is most likely what I would've done). He went to YHWH and said, "I asked you what was going to happen today and you said lots of change. I have seen no change today, so I'm taking the word back to you. I know I heard it." YHWH told him to put his hand in his left pocket. He felt a bunch of coins and realized he had gotten lots of change from several purchases he had made. The point wasn't that it was a big revelation he needed to receive ahead of time...the point was that YHWH was training him to hear. If Jim had dismissed that word, he wouldn't have heard YHWH tell him to check his pockets. He never would've known that he actually did hear YHWH correctly and would've missed out on an opportunity to grow in his faith.

I'll leave you with one last thought from the teaching. Your ability to hear from YHWH is like a vessel that receives revelation...and if you use it, it'll grow. The day is coming and quickly approaching when YHWH is going to outpour more faith than you can contain. Whether He overflows your thimble or your bucket is up to you. The more you can contain, the more you will operate in. Don't be left standing in front of the opened, gushing fire hydrant holding a thimble.

LOOK
ADMIT
EXPECT

Are you prophetic?

In a few short weeks, I will be heading down to NC for Morning Star's annual prophetic conference. As excited as I am about that, it's sort of bitter sweet in the sense that I have to come back home where I have no fellowship in that area. Pierre says that means I should start something. Surprise, surprise.

I was watching something on television last night (I know, bad Yadi) about psychic children. I could relate to a lot of things that were being said - the fact that you often feel all kinds of deep emotions for no reason at all because you are picking up on things going on around you (my problem is that I identify with every emotion I feel instead of being objective enough to know the feeling just might not be originating from me), the fact that "psychic abilities" tend to run in families (most of the family on my father's side is paranormal), the feeling of being an outsider while growing up (I overcompensated for this by becoming President of everything and keeping the "weird stuff" for home). It was a good reminder to me of what it's like being a child with paranormal abilities; a reminder that was needed since my children will most likely experience a lot of the things that I did (minus the séances).

The good news is that my children will never have to wander into the dark side of things because they will always know where their giftings come from and who they are meant to glorify. I realized today that every creative tool I've ever used has drawn tremendous emotional responses from people at one time or another, saved and unsaved a like. Whether it has been drawing, painting, dancing, singing, public speaking, and even photography, I believe the link that ties it all together is the prophetic. I believe the gift I need to be giving myself to more than any other is the prophetic - and everything else will flow from that. I believe He wants to use the myriad of creative talents He gave me to speak His message to different people.

I definitely see now that Point of Creation has a lot more to do with the prophetic than it has to do with the creative arts. I see a common thread of it in all the girls Yahweh has chosen to be a part of POC. In all my commitments to honing my different creative gifts, I've never truly made a long lasting commitment to honing my prophetic gifts. My priorities were off. It's like I've been on a long journey that has brought me right back to where I started - the primal, rudimentary essence of who Yahweh created me to be.

I'm feeling so pschytso right now...like every week I'm on a new path. Bear with me, I'm a work in progress and I'm not afraid to let you know. lol. If this post speaks to you in any way, please comment. I need to know where the other "psychic" children are.

Awe CRAP

Just when I decide to mind my own business and stop paying attention to what this crazy world is doing, I happen across a new bill that has been passed which directly affects my unborn child.

As of April 24, 2008, President Bush signed a new bill into law for the purpose of establishing a national DNA database. This bill (S.1858 "The Newborn Screening Saves Lives Act of 2007") authorizes the federal government to screen the DNA of all newborn babies in the U.S. within six months and warehouse it. This stored DNA can then be used for genetic experiments and tests without parental consent. Are you friggin' kidding me?

This is just one more thing I will have to decline with a signature because it goes against my "religious beliefs". I'm glad good 'ole religion is still a viable plea; but for how long? ...and if they're doing it without parental knowledge, who is to say that the little pku test they draw blood for isn't being used for DNA screening as well? Giving birth at home is sounding reeeeaaaaal good right about now.

Death - the last enemy to be defeated

Many people have been asking about fundraising since reading one of my previous posts. I have been researching and will definitely get back to that; but for right now, death is my target.

Yesterday was Kevin Cromer's funeral. My family was in attendance and my husband was asked to speak. The situation of his untimely death, combined with my own poor job of guarding the gates to my soul, has made me very death conscious. I lay in bed fully aware of my heartbeat and how fragile everything in my body is.

During the altar call, the preacher said that death comes a-knockin' and can come at anytime. He said we weren't even guaranteed to get home safe after leaving there. Life could all stop without my will or consent. Is that the truth? Not according to scripture.

Death is an enemy of Yah. The scriptures do not say the wages of life is death; it says the wages of sin is death. Even when Adam sinned, it took 930 years for that sin to work its way to death. Yet today death is manifesting so fast we just assume it is out of our control. However, I seem to remember Yeshua saying that He Himself had to give up his life in order to die. I absolutely remember him raising the dead a few times with just a touch or a word. I even remember Paul making a conscious decision to stay on earth because it would be more beneficial to those around him.

I read something in a book this week about innocence. It gave one of the definitions as, "having no consciousness of mortality or morality." I thought that was wrong at first, until I thought of my son. He is 1.5, he has no awareness of death and no awareness of morals. He just is. He lives in the moment, he trusts, he plays, he laughs, he gets frustrated when things don't seem right to him. He is innocent. Adam and Eve were innocent in this same regard.

Innocence is what the enemy fights so hard to steal from us. Innocence is what brings power to heal the sick and raise the dead. The scriptures teach that if we are not childlike, we will not enter the Kingdom of Heaven. We have become so desensitized to death and sickness that we are not moved with compassion to eradicate it - we accept it as a way of life in ourselves and others.

It has to stop. At the end of my Kevin Cromer post I asked what it is that we are not getting. I got my answer - we have lost our innocence. Life is more powerful than death, but we have a lot more death in us than we even realize. The life we receive from hearing and reading scriptures has to contend with the death we receive from television, movies, advertisements and conversations. So many things we allow to pass through our gates (eyes, ears, etc) on a daily basis are in direct opposition to the scriptures.

In that same book about innocence, the author speaks of his 3 year old son receiving a McDonald's toy in his happy meal of the Hunchback of Notre Dame. He started to cry. When his father asked why, he said, "This man needs healing." That is the compassion, sensitivity and innocence that I yearn for. It is more important to me than anything I can ever entertain myself with.

It's not too big of a goal to be pure and innocent enough in my thinking in order to take the scriptures at face value and raise the dead. It's not too much to ask to be able to spend enough time with my Abba that His power manifests in me and sets people free. My soul is crying out for consecration.

Today

I have so many important things to write about - truly - but I just want to take this moment to document that today, July 10th 2008...the day Joshua has officially turned a year and a half...he saw fit to take dry erase markers and scribble all over the hardwood floors in not one but two places. Foolishness is indeed in the heart of a child.

Kevin Cromer

I was going through some old blog entries, reliving past revelations and laughing at my own journey - when the news I heard yesterday evening hit me in the gut again. Kevin Cromer has passed. That's how my husband put it when he got the phone call from Stephen (at church). Kevin Cromer has passed.

Kevin Cromer (or Triple A, as I would call him - the anointed, ambulating apostle) was born with spina bifida and was wheelchair bound his entire life. He was hilarious, loving, and very intelligent. He was my friend.

I cried when I heard the news. I'm tearing up writing this. Oh I know where he is now, and I know he has his glorified body and that he is happier right now than he has ever been in this life. I understand and fully believe that. That knowledge is what keeps us believers from the grief that overtakes many when they lose a friend or relative.

What deeply saddens me is what his "death" represents. It embodies all of the unfulfilled promises, the unreceived end to our expectations, the hope that seemingly bore no fruit. It signifies the prayers without answer, the pure and consistent belief for healing in this lifetime that seemed to fall to the ground.

Pierre says it is always something on our end that went wrong, never on Yah's end. But over and over again? What about the young stranger I prayed for in my early days of salvation with every ounce of faith I had; when I looked into his mother's face and said everything was going to be ok as he laid there comatose in the hospital - only to get a phone call a few days later that he had died? What about all of those that have "passed" recently, leaving behind those same unfulfilled promises?

What is it that we're not getting?

Time to raise some funds

I woke up this morning having dreamt something that stirred me to the very core. Our church is currently awaiting half a million dollars that was promised from some mystery man and hasn't shown up. We want to use that money to lease church space for a year or so downtown Manhattan. When we thought we had the moneys in hand, our pastor's wife gave a strong reproof to the congregation that basically went something like this, "Don't rejoice, you lazy people! Someone else is getting the credit for what you should have done yourselves!" Of course, she was a little nicer about it, but that was the gist. Shortly after that, the moneys evaporated into thin air.

In my dream, I was yelling at everyone. I was asking them why we, as able-bodied adults, were sitting around waiting for $500,000 to fall out of the sky. What ever happened to fund raising? What's wrong with bake sales, yard sales, mowing lawns, singing on the subway...whatever?! If everyone does a little, even if we can raise $100,000 - it's more than we have now. Since when did we become of those sort that sit around and wait for blessing to land on our laps?

I woke up realizing that we are really lazy. Why? Because we've sown seed? So now we feel entitled? Imagine farmers sowing seeds and then going and sitting on their couch, praying for watermelons to land on their laps; praying for someone to show up at their door with potatoes. That's ridiculous. Having sown seed, you have to then put your hand to the plow. You gotta go dig up your harvest. The work doesn't end. Does the miraculous happen where checks show up out of nowhere and Yah speaks to people to give you money? Of course. The Word does say that men will give unto your bossom. Yet that's one friggin' scripture. The rest of the scriptures speak of hard work and persecution. We bank so much on that one miraculous line in the bible that we are crippled from the satisfaction of accomplishing Yah's will on earth for ourselves.

It not only goes for Faith Exchange, my church. It goes for us as individuals. It is so easy to make money in this country, if you really think about it. People will pay for almost anything. Yet we get so grandiose in our thinking; we think we have to build multi-million dollar companies overnight in order to affect any sort of real change...meanwhile we are living in lack. We, healthy/able-bodied/intelligent/good looking/strong/talented/entrepreneurial GIANTS are in lack because we think so much on the huge things we will do one day that we forget the small things we can do today. What about collecting the loose change laying all around the house? What ever happened to the concept of bit by bit, little by little? Isn't it possible that as we are diligent to do the little things, Yah will supernaturally bless it and triple our efforts? Gosh.

Where do we get this stinkin' mentality from? Certainly not from our pastors, who have given more of their personal substance than I think I have ever earned in my lifetime thus far. They travel the country, and other countries, helping every one that needs it. My pastor is working on global water initiatives and speaking with Indian chiefs to bring aid to their communities. He's constantly bringing different vehicles into the church to help people make money. Yet as a congregation, we are so inward focused. Every space we have been able to have church in has been a supernatural blessing - yet what have we really done to help the communities we've been in? We sit in our four walls and wait for bigger and better things while our harvest rots...the harvest of moneys AND the harvest of souls.

I am convinced Yah is not pleased with us as a congregation (our pastors aside). I am also convinced that the smallest effort and change of heart would bring about such a huge bounty. I am now on a fund raising frenzy...personally, and for the church. This is not the last you will hear of this. Oh and if this is like anything else I have ever done, I'm dragging EVERYONE in with me. Onward to corporate blessing through individual best effort. Onward to debt eradication everywhere.

Bye-Bye Fever

I want to start off by saying that my blog has not been neglected...I've just been enjoying putting entries in the photo blog. You can go there to see what I've been up to.

In other news, Joshua woke up Monday morning with a fever of 101.4. There were no other symptoms. Throughout the day he was eating and playing as normal, but after his afternoon nap the fever got even higher. Pierre wasn't home so I had no transportation to take him to the hospital...admittedly I would not have done that anyway. Pierre got home and we did everything in the natural (homeopathic) as well as in the spirit to take care of him. The fever persisted through the night and he started having convulsions (not seizures; tremors). He was in and out of sleep and it was a long night for all of us.

He woke up the next morning totally fine, only to get an even higher fever in the early evening. This time I gave in, gave him children's tylenol and made a doc appt for the next morning. That evening, Pierre and I took communion.

This morning he woke up fine and remained fine all day long. Praise Yah. We took him to the doc and she said she saw some sores on his throat, but didn't prescribe any antibiotics (praise Yah again because Pierre would've made him take them). He is totally healed. It was so nice to feel my baby's cool skin all day long. Aaahhhhhhhhh. Refreshing. There is nothing like a covenant with my Yah. We always know how the story ends.